Men are like Rubber Bands?
I am very surprised to know men have an intimacy cycle, just like Rubber Bands. Closer, then pull away; closer, then pull away. They have needs for both intimacy and autonomy. That's why they are always causing women feel that being disgarded. It's not because she has done something wrong, just because of the cycle. So men also have a cycle. :-)
I read this rule from "Men from Mars; Women from Venus". But I think this rule is also true for women. I remember one person said, all people have three needs: family, community and job. Lose of any needs will cause uncomfortable. I totally agree with this. I am not those kind of people who can be at home all days, although I always dream that way.
Every year, my company will spend a lot of time for employees to write their commitments, action item and accountability. It's a good expereince. You need think about the career, and write it down. Shall we also have a commitment to our personal life? to another 2 important parts of our life? However, it is such a complex question, and I don't know. Leave it to next topic.
Comments
Wendy, 很喜歡你寫的文字﹐淡淡的﹐清幽的﹐很自然的感覺。但字里行間又能看出你的自信﹐坦然地將自己的心跡表露出來。
我也曾把你的BLOG介紹給我女兒看﹐她也叫WENDY﹐今年小學六年級﹐我家WENDY仿彿對小說興趣濃些﹐ 對散文隨筆之類卻很少看﹐都是當我看到好的文章時留起﹐硬塞給她看﹐我希望有一天她學會欣賞。
Posted by: Jane | June 20, 2004 02:52 AM
Neither you or your husband ever mentioned about cooking. Do you eat out a lot since you both have very demanding jobs? Saturday may be the time to utilize your beatifully decorated kitchen and dining room and make and enjoy rommantic dinner together.
Posted by: Cindy | June 20, 2004 04:17 AM
响应您老公的号召!
Those commenting on your blog entries are predominantly girls. Maybe this discourages boys from doing the same!? Hehe...
Posted by: WilliamW | June 20, 2004 07:45 AM
我们家一直都是我做饭，做什么他就吃什么，没得挑。如果不想做，那就出去吃。上海吃的东西很好吃，随便找家小店，都还不错，没有理由天天自己受罪。不过偶尔做做饭，感觉还不错，节省了开支，还挺香。
Posted by: fanfan | June 20, 2004 12:19 PM
Wendy JJ周末搬号家了吗？搬好了我们要看照片。：）
Posted by: Grace Zhang | June 21, 2004 12:39 PM
你说的是地下铁的咖啡馆里面的那个mm吗？那是我学生的女朋友，还是我启发了他们用blog呢。
Posted by: hippy | June 21, 2004 10:01 PM
I find your page through your husband's and I think I will read it often in the future.
Posted by: Agnes | June 22, 2004 09:15 AM
是的，hippy,就是那个你说的网站。原来世界这样小。
Posted by: fanfan | June 22, 2004 12:53 PM
什么网站哦
Posted by: libol | August 4, 2004 01:37 PM
生词太多，实在没能看完……
Posted by: gao | September 16, 2004 03:07 AM
I came across that book once in the National Library in Beijing. Just glanced part of it and I was impressed by the chapter which mentions that Men want trust and appreciation most, while women put caring and understanding in the first place. Chinese version was also available long time ago though.
Posted by: ingrid | September 17, 2004 02:56 AM
It is such a coincidence to ready your articl, but they are beautiful. I am very very touched by you. I am in Jacksonvill, Florida. Thinking about moving to Seattle. That's how I got to read your article. Maybe someday we will meet in Shanghai which is my hometown.
Posted by: Beibei | January 14, 2005 04:17 AM