September 07, 2005

午夜的收音机

假期室友都回去只剩我一个在寝室的时,我总是会整天整夜地开着收音机。虽然不是一个怕孤单的人,甚至我会觉得这样的孤单是一种享受,但还是会忍不住想要有一些声音。不管说些什么唱些什么,只要让周围不是太安静,安静到让我自己跟自己说话就行了。
才搬了家,好不容易把简陋的新家布置得蛮像回事,鼓鼓却开始一直出差了。于是每天回家第一件事就是打开收音机。吃苹果时开着,洗澡时开着,用功时开着声音小一些,睡觉时还开着声音再小一点。
我从小学六年级开始就有开着收音机睡觉的习惯了,清楚地记得那时候听的是792千赫的《相伴到黎明》。每天都是在有着这样那样苦闷的听众倾诉或求助的电话中无忧无虑地睡去,偶尔醒来朦朦胧胧听上几句歌。升初中后还喜欢听一档节目,交通台的《小茗时间》。节目的片头似乎是这样的:“我是一个喜欢在黄昏时说话的女人。我的名字叫小茗,一个不是很响亮,永远都长不大的名字。……”那时候的我还不好意思说出“女人”这个词,说起来总是要带着个职业,女教师,女医生,女厨师……若说自己及自己的朋友,就是女生,女孩。而今,若要再自称“女孩”就会觉得矫情的无以复加了,被别人称作“女孩”也会让我很是别扭。我是“正在努力奔三的女人”了,记住了哦。
时间在流,听众从女孩长大成了女人,广播却还是原来的广播。依旧有点歌,依旧有咋咋呼呼随意聊天式的轻松主持,依旧有音乐伴奏下轻轻念出的爱情故事,依旧有半夜的谈心,依旧有数不清的好听歌曲及同样数不清的广告。偶尔还能听到几个熟悉的名字,十多年前的主持人,还在重复着过去的播音,很奇怪为什么他们还能热情依然。而我,虽然有一些厌倦,却还是会把收音机一直开着。至少只有我一个人的时候它可以对我说话。甚至我还可以打电话去,如果实在太闷,害怕自己会得失语症的话。上一次打电话应该是在大一寒假前了。那一夜南京开始下雪,寝室里三张收拾得干干净净的床铺让我觉得分外冷清。那个前两天还在电话里弹吉它给我唱歌的人也回家了,翻着电话本我找不到可以说话的人,于是拨号到电台,甚至还没来得及听清那晚的主题是什么。梦呓般东拉西扯一阵,然后安心睡去。
收音机总还是个好东西,虽然老了点,土了点。至少现在,我还能从中听到久违的好歌:Bonnie Tyler 的Total Eclipse of the Heart。


Posted by elfe at September 7, 2005 03:21 AM
Comments

我最近也想起小茗呢,当时很喜欢她的节目的。但是有一天,跟很多不幸一样,小茗永远离开了。还记得她的声音,正如elfe记下的那个开场。

Posted by: yumy at September 19, 2005 10:49 PM

啊?小茗怎么了?什么时候的事?

Posted by: Elfe at September 20, 2005 12:32 PM

你好,我是一个喜欢小茗的人,因为想念她,将她的名字打入电脑搜索,无意间进入了你的网页,看到你的文字觉得好熟悉,或许是因为小茗吧!:)

Posted by: 一个喜欢小茗的人 at November 24, 2005 09:36 PM

你好,和上面一位网友一样,我是在午夜里突然想到搜索小茗时间,无意间来到你的博客。
读了你的《午夜里的收音机》心中一惊,和你好相像啊。我也是从小学六年级开始听《相伴到黎明》,至今十多年了。那时候疯狂喜爱电台节目,初中的时候一直听小茗时间,给小茗写过信,她还在节目中播了。一直到大四还断断续续听她的节目。记得她大约就是02年冬天的时候出车祸的……

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